15 things I learned this weekend

15 things I learned  this weekend

1- Never tell your children to hurry because you need to pee. They will be as slow as humanly possible, run from you and laugh while you are doing the infamous "pee pee dance"

2- Dodge ball in the house is a horrible idea. Things will get broken.

3-Hiding behind the kids does not stop my husband from squirting me with a water gun.

4-If your kids get extremely quiet, then you hear a 3 year old yell "charge!!" Duck and cover. Seriously DUCK AND COVER!

5-If your kid has an explosive diapers, one of those that the poo goes all the way to their arm pits, just stick them in the shower and hose them down. Easiest way possible.

6- I think I am a little bit in love with Jase from Duck Dynasty.

7- A 1 year old that's teething plus a runny nose that's eating a ring pop is disgusting. Sticky snot and drool everywhere.

8- When playing hide and seek never ever hide in a confined space with kid #1. He will fart every single time.

9- Kid #2 is  entirely to clingy. I think he would be happy if he was permanently attached to my hip.

10- According to #1 it is fine to go out on the front porch in cowboy boots, superman undies, his little brothers t-shirt, while carrying a plastic Nerf gun, and tell the neighbors he is a cowboy.

11- If you are extremely pale DO NOT try to use the lotion that is supposed to gradually tan you. You will be orange.

12- #1 will yell "HI!" and wave at the neighbors while pissing off the front porch.

13- If you have a belly ring in, DO NOT lean against a plastic slide. It will get stuck and almost rip out.

14- If I take 2 Hydroxycut I suddenly have the motivation to clean my ENTIRE house. Twice.

15- Don't trust a 3 year old if he informs you he is a big boy and doesn't need to wear a pull-up to bed.

Overall it was a great weekend . My kids are hilarious and I wouldn't trade their crazyness for anything in the world.